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September 30th, 2006
06:23 am
So. It's 6:23 and I felt like I needed to post something.
I'm eating a bowl of fruit! But it's only two kinds, because I didn't feel like cutting up a peach.
Nectarine. Cantelope.
Glass of Grape Juice.
Guacamole dip.
Not really that last one.
I go to work today.
Ummm what else...OH yea I bet everything will break again like it always does, and then get some angry customers from the slowness of it all.
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06:27 am
Oh yea I was going to talk about my dream.
I had a dream I was on The Man Show because I won some kind of contest or something...and got like free everything to go out there and I had backstage tickets blah blah blah. So I meet Jimmy Kimmel, and he's an ASSHOLE. Just a complete douchebag. I was pretty crushed. Anyway I'm driving home, and I'm unfamiliar with the town so I get lost. I see this guy I met in WoW with his girlfriend, and I'm like "hey man! It's me Ken!" and he gets in the car and we talk or whatever. Then I see Dillon and so now Dillon gets in the car. So we're driving along and I get pulled over by this cop.
This cop starts talking to me and doesn't even tell me why he pulled me over. I have no idea why he pulled me over. But he starts testing me...like he's saying shit to me like "Alright I'm going to have you prove to me you have some competance. I want you to start naming words between Ben and W40, and don't stop until I tell you to." I don't start naming words I just sit there all quiet. He had this attitude like...it didn't matter if I really did the tests or not. He was going to be an asshole.
He's writing on a notepad and saying some more shit and then he finally just turns insane and is trying to scare us. Like he pulls out these needlenose pliers and is holding them up. Then he pulls out a little blowtorch, like one of those small ones, and starts heating it up...it's getting pretty red, and my friend's girlfriend is getting scared because she thinks he's going to hurt us with it.
So it's all red now, and he stops heating it up. And he holds it by the end with the handle pointed down and he says to me "Take this." I hesitate. "HOLD IT NOW!" I lift my hand up to see if I can hold the handle, but the rubber part of it was all melted and stuff and I just say to him "I can't!"
I'm just thinking "Jesus what is this guy's problem?". Anyway he throws it down and I wake up.
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04:33 pm
| Your Penis Name Is... | 
Squirmin' Herman the One-Eyed German |
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